Saying No, Until You Know

For many women, the wedding dress is supposed to be the culminating representation of their youth and passage from innocence into womanhood. Except that in 21st century America, both the delay of marriage as a result of degrees n “stuff,” paired with the economic conditions that force so many of us to not be able to live alone while attaining those degrees n “stuff” (stuff descriptively referring to those first few years of getting paid squat to work your tail off)….has pretty much led to a culture where living in sin is not just in. It’s usually a much better alternative. And a feasible reality. In fact, of all of the friends and relatives I know who have been married in the past five years, I can only think of one couple that was not already living together–and they were in their forties. So what does this all mean? Not much. What was my point?

So the virtuosity and untarnished reputation of the wedding dress have taken on a lesser meaning, whether gratefully accepted or rejected by the brides in question. For me, this meant setting my sights on a black dress. Slightly morbid? Exactly.

So as soon as that feeble idea was wiped from my mind, I was ready (and I will admit excited) to find just the right dress. I anticipated weeks of frustrated hours spent rejecting dress after dress before the final revelation would emerge before my eyes! But actually, it took all of three hours. I was shocked at how quickly the process went! An impromptu afternoon of mimosas and meandering with my mom and sister was all it took to nail the dress…and it should arrive by September, no alterations even needed (as of yet that is).

I tried on a total of 7 dresses; loved them all…except for the one styled after Ariel from The Little Mermaid. I was definitely not meant to be a Disney bride. However, the second I put on “the” dress, and my helpful consultant styled it, we all sighed an audible gasp. In fact, it drew the attention from all of the surrounding consultants and clients and was pretty clear to everyone–this was it!

I didn’t really go in with any clear idea. I said I either wanted subtle and lace or big and structured, so left the door pretty much wide open. I tried on different versions and tried to stay within my budget range. But in the end, there really was no question or debate. So all of that advice about ending up with one you never would have imagined, didn’t exactly pan out for me. The best advice is to keep an open mind and try on a variety–they don’t look the same on the rack as they do on the body, and your body is a whole different story.

Some Near Misses…


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